Married with $14k debt … what’s the best way out?

My wife and I are feeling stuck with about $14,000 in total debt, and we want to find the best way to get out of it as soon as possible.

Here’s some background:
I’m the sole income earner, working as a firefighter with a take-home pay of around $60k per year. My wife stays home to care for our baby, but she’s open to working if we can make it work with daycare costs. So far, she’s had no luck finding a job. Our mortgage is $1,200 a month, and we don’t have any car or student loans. We have about $100k in home equity but don’t want to refinance or get a HELOC because it would raise our 3.1% mortgage rate. Our savings aren’t enough to pay off the debt without leaving us without an emergency fund. My income barely covers our living expenses, but we’ve cut back and saved about $300 a month by canceling things we don’t really need.

Here’s the breakdown of our debt:

  • $6,000 in credit card debt: Most of this is from new floors ($3,500), a Steam Deck ($700), and a new workbench ($1,000). The rest ($800) is Christmas gifts and recurring bills that we pay off monthly.
  • $7,000 business loan: Monthly payment is $225, and we have 3.5 years left. We borrowed $10k for my wife to start a consulting business, but she hasn’t had any clients yet and is applying for jobs.

We’ve already transferred the $6k in credit card debt to a new card with 0% interest for 18 months. I’m also working as much overtime as I can, but I feel like I’m nearing burnout, and my mental health is taking a hit. What else can we do to get out of this? Any advice is appreciated.

Since you’ve cut back all you can, the next step is adding income. Your wife could try Instacart or Spark, even with the baby. I used to make $250 a week working about 20 hours. Some couples do DoorDash together on weekends. Even small amounts can help chip away at the debt.

@Blake
I make $250 in a single 12-hour overtime shift, so I feel like I should just focus on that. I also don’t feel comfortable with my wife driving around doing DoorDash with our baby. Doing it as a couple might add more stress than it’s worth.

@Harlow
She could look for work-from-home jobs, even if they don’t pay much. It would add something without daycare costs.

@Blake
This is a great idea! My cousin does Instacart with her baby in a carrier, and she loves it. Plus, it gets her out of the house.

@Drake
A Steam Deck is a gaming device. It’s basically a toy and not something your family needed right now. When I was in debt, I made it a rule not to buy anything fun unless I could pay for it outright. It’s tough, but you’ll thank yourself later. Also, selling things you don’t need can help make extra money. It’s all about small steps.

Stop buying stuff you don’t need just to treat yourself.

Darwin said:
Stop buying stuff you don’t need just to treat yourself.

Fair enough. The Steam Deck and workbench could’ve waited, but the floors were a must. The old carpet was in bad shape, and switching to LVP has really helped with my allergies. I installed it myself, so all the cost was materials, not labor.

You’ve already cut back, so increasing income is the way to go. Be careful with the balance transfer. Too many people use those to push off dealing with debt, and the balance doesn’t shrink. Use the low rate to pay more than the minimum each month and attack the debt aggressively.

@Jordan
We’re planning to throw $500–$1,000 a month at the debt. The interest has been brutal. Looking back, I probably shouldn’t have bought the Steam Deck, workbench, and flooring so close together.

Harlow said:
@Jordan
We’re planning to throw $500–$1,000 a month at the debt. The interest has been brutal. Looking back, I probably shouldn’t have bought the Steam Deck, workbench, and flooring so close together.

You definitely didn’t need a $1,000 workbench or the Steam Deck. Don’t buy stuff like that on credit—it just makes things harder in the long run.

How’s your credit score? Have you considered a personal loan to consolidate the credit card debt? Also, what kind of consulting business does your wife run? Maybe she could adjust her marketing approach to attract clients.

You’re doing the right things already. Use the extra $300 you’ve freed up to focus on the smallest debt first, then roll it into the next. You’ll get through this if you stay consistent.

Ben said:
You’re doing the right things already. Use the extra $300 you’ve freed up to focus on the smallest debt first, then roll it into the next. You’ll get through this if you stay consistent.

Thanks! I’m hoping to pay off the credit cards by the end of the year.

We’re in a similar spot. I started using a basic Excel sheet to track every purchase, and it’s helped us cut back a lot. Stressing about debt made my anxiety worse, but reframing it helped. Debt is just a tool we used when we needed it, and now we’re working to fix it. It’s not easy, but having a plan makes it feel manageable.

Don’t stress too much, man. Just pay a little more than the interest each month and focus on what you do have—a home and a great mortgage rate. You’re already ahead of many people.

Where’s your money going? With no car loan and a $1,200 mortgage, your income should leave room to tackle the debt. Consolidate onto the 0% card and pay $800 a month until it’s gone, leaving $3,000 for everything else.

Your wife could substitute teach part-time or work at Amazon. Her income could go straight toward paying down debt or saving.

Wait… a Steam Deck? Like a handheld gaming thing? Maybe take a couple of overtime shifts to cover that and the workbench while you figure out the rest. The debt isn’t unmanageable—you just need to tackle the unnecessary stuff first.

Why do firefighters make so little? Your job is hard, dangerous, and saves lives. Have you and your wife looked into online work or sales? Maybe a hardship program for your debt could help?